Life For Rent

It's another day and still the questions remain.
Maybe it's all just in my head. I just feel that there is something that just isn't quite right or else maybe commication is breaking down. I don't know.
Maybe I said something or did something that offended him. I don't know.
Then I need to get on taking care of food stamps AND housing. The whole housing thing got dropped after we got back from Mexico a month ago. FREAK! A whole month!
Anyway..... I put this video of the song Life For Rent by Dido on here because it rings true for me.  I really haven't done much in my life. And I am 33. There is another song I can think of that sums it up. It's by Stabbing Westward, it says "When I reach the end, will anything I've done mean anything...." Sometimes I really wonder that.
Then Steve told me that he is afraid of me leaving him so I found the perfect song for him. No getting him to read it (the lyrics) and listen to the song is going to be a big feat all in itself.
I guess I have been a bit cold myself lately.
Then my friggin ex promises our daughter a birthday party and to get her the Star Wars Lego set of Darth Vader's Tie Fighter and he didn't come through with it. As I thought would happen. He has always been that way. (Chris, my ex.) All talk, no show. That is why I get nervous when people start making promises to me. So I guess he ruined me in a way. But anyway.....
I need to quit staying up so late cause nothing is getting done. I think that's been bugging me too. I'm sure it's buggin Steve.
Me and him need to talk. And I need to open up a little more and quit being such a butthead.